Have yourself a merry little Christmas

Composer - Hugh Martin

Introduced by Judy Garland in 1944

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Let your heart be light
From now on,
our troubles will be out of sight

Have yourself a merry little Christmas,
Make the Yule-tide gay,
From now on,
our troubles will be miles away.

Here we are as in olden days,
Happy golden days of yore.
Faithful friends who are dear to us
Gather near to us once more.

Through the years
We all will be together,
If the Fates allow
Hang a shining star upon the highest bough.
And have yourself A merry little Christmas now.

recorded this since im free at home..

the piano chords r a bit weird coz i played it thru trial n error method.. =P

it's not perfect.. anyhow, juz to wish u guys Happy Christmas!!

happy holidays!! ^^

it's another year..

坐在电脑前， 心情顿时很复杂； 思绪错乱， 一窝蜂涌上头脑。。

首先， 正式宣布我的5th Sem已经完成了； 不过还不知道是不是顺利的过了。。 哈哈。。

还是一样那句， 迷糊的半年。。

sorry mum, for letting you worry about me.. im trying my best; to squeeze out the best in me, it's not ur responsibilities; so please don't worry.. ^^

说到家人， 一直有种遗憾； 好像自己一直不能为他们贡献些什么。。

因为连自己都管不了自己， 很对不起他们。。

恨自己的长不大； 恨自己的无能； 恨自己不够爱他们。。

我的家。。。

im proud of them.. proud to be one of them..

让我思绪错乱的：

http://www.facebook.com/note.php?note_id=181668725179222&id=754228704

刚开始读时还以为是开玩笑的， 但， 他真的走了。

我真的很、很、很疑惑。。

为什么会有这种人？

不是要鄙视还是看不起他； 而是真正的打从心底感到疑惑。。

blinded by love??

认为自己一直长不大， 可是， 他。。

他跟我同岁。。

思想竟是如此..?!

让我感到难过的是， 世界上和他有同样思想的人还有很多。。

只有主能救他们了。。

to all homo sapiens:
get ur priorities in life right!!
it's frustrating to see people so lost; even way lost than me..!!
love yourself and those who really love you..

又一年了； 我又做了什么？

知道吗？ 我在逃避； 因为我知道结果。

Outdated post - 13th Nov

listening to Sarah McLachlan's Angel..

my trip back home last week leaves me wif lots of 'feel'..

haha.. wat 'feel'? u may ask..

i dunno, hard to explain.. i'll try..

the feel of happiness while enjoyin my mum's cooking;

the feel of satisfaction to be wif my family, even by juz watchin tv and laughing together;

the feel of sadness to see grandma in pain when her sickness strikes suddenly;

the feel of realizing how small i am in helping, effort and ability wise;

the feel of emptiness when all i get in my sms inbox are ad-smses frm maxis and hotlink;

the feel of regret when i din touched any book; (except Facebook)

the feel of anger when i slept til noon everyday, wasting those precious time;

the feel of consolation when mum n 2sis tried to calm me down when my nerves are gettin to me;

the feel of awesomeness to hv some decent meals after all these while of 3.60/3.90 meals;

the feel of 'glee' juz to be at home........

.....................

................

much, much more feel which i cant describe..

as we get older, feelings get more and more significant, hard to ignore juz how they make an impact in ur heart..

seems like yesterday i was juz

18: enjoyin the time of my life in NS, and

19: nervously gettin ready for stpm, and

20: entering U and going thru orientation week..

somehow i gotta admit that my enjoyable life stops at 20..

people always says uni life is the best time, i hv my own opinion for dat: it's not..

mayb it's coz of my course..

the only exception was my coursemates and the people i meet..

im stil having doubt for me choosing this path.. bio is stil better for me..

nevetheless, there's no point goin on and on twirlling around, i should juz put it down n stop bothering mum.. it's not fair to her.. i noe..

uni life has the worse effect on my health; while wat i conclude from this is dat i lack: self control, discipline and determination..

uni life anyone?? i'll exchange it for something with great value of money..

but i'll most probably regret later on.. haha..

i found my diaries when i was goin through my old stuffs..

childish, is wat i use to describe it.. hahahaha...

but i can see me growing up page by page; i've been on it for more than 5 years!! without me noticing..

why'd i stopped? i guess technology overcame it.. i had my laptop.. then there's blog..

but honestly, my diary pages are more real, i was true to myself..

im not sayin my blog posts aren't real, but rather there're some feelings that i kept concealed..

another thing that i notice is that there's more happiness between the diary pages those past years compared to now..

the phrase "growing up happily" seems like a fairytale after all, as problems come with age..

haha... here i am, complaining like an old grandma..

i should stop whining... i hate it too when ppl do dat..

i should stil keep some hopes..

i should concern more about my family and friends..

i should stop dreaming..

i should.....

i should...

i should.

i should start studying........!!!

note to self: i should start my diary entries again..

people don't always practice what they preach

完了？！

矛盾着该用华语还是英文。。

还是华语好了。。

我的3rd year, 1st sem， 完了。。

而我， 好像也是完了。。

短短的几个月， 过完了， 还是空空荡荡的头脑； 空荡的心情。。

学了些什么？ ~ 抄功课吧。。 哈哈。。

哈哈， 朋友说我的blog很emo喔。。

有吗？？ 偶尔吧， 我不可能永远都保持着快乐的心情啊。。

只有遇过人生的低潮， 才会知道真正开心时候的重要性。。

朋友又说我很幼稚。。

不过， 我觉得比起以前， 我成熟了很多。。 尤其是NS过后。。

（好像在自挖坑洞说自己以前更幼稚。。　哈哈。。）

朋友又说我的样子很惹人笑。。

其实他们还没看过我以前的样子。。

宅女一个；　活在自己的世界里（虽然现在还是有点）；　不是很理睬别人。。

还是一样；　NS让我改变了。。

还有我Form6时的那班死党，　真的，　他们让我改变了不少。。

那些人，　你们自己知道是谁啦。。　^^

有时候，　曾怀疑过自己，　是否该改变。。

行为上，　言语上，　举止上。。

至少在别人眼里我还是认真的，　不是那么爱玩、搞怪。。

但后来还是决定了；　不想过回以前封闭自己的生活。。

我希望自己是带给别人欢乐的人，　虽然偶尔心情还是会闷闷的，　尽量不表现出来就好了。。　别人开心，　我也会感到欣慰。。　至少能让别人转换一下心情。。

不是想说自己很伟大或是什么，　只是自己心里的一个……　心愿吧。。

但是如果有时候我办不到的话，　请原谅我。。

话说回来，　真的好奇为什么自己的心情会那么容易的被牵动。。

还是一样。。

该不该把过去都忘记，　重新开始呢？

好了，　emo一次过写完了。。　哈哈。。

明天回家咯！！！

姐姐生病赶快好起来吧。。　祈祷。。

突然很想念阿嫲。。　明天就能见到她咯！！　^^

晚安，　世界。。

心中的秘密，　还是秘密。。

at last, a rest stop..

juz came back from 'little genting', where all the couples go there to ...... ( continue in ur own words.. haha.. )

Note: time now is 4AM.....

it was somehow a crazy day.. guess everyone was juz too tension.....

another thing to take note is that our "god" came wif us too.. haha... it's great to see him outside skul compound, at least he is less 'god-like' in his casual clothes.. haha...

dinner was like a course gathering, minus "some" people who were busy and add one more which somehow is literally connected to our course.. hehe... guess who is he on ur own..

come to think of it, we're gettin less n less closer compared to our 1st and 2nd years, where we'll be goin out everywhere together n takin GBs of pics... this course is reali gettin hard on us...

so for this sem, after next week, it is officially over, minus the study weeks n exams..

wat have i done n learned? i asked..

it's disheartening...........................

but stil, we can't look back and think of what we should hv done earlier; instead, looking ahead and think of what we can do..

though easier said than done........

it's stil the need to prove to my family that they can believe in me, especially mum; i dunno whether i'll let them down onot....... =|

hwaiting!!!

as for IP, reali am short of words to decribe how i feel about it....

but, all of us reali did our best, that's one thing that im proud of our members n leader..

let's hope we'll get better next sem......

as for now, i need some sleep..........

nite world.......

smile..... =)

somehow people don't take me seriously, does it bothers me? sometimes..

but "y so serious?"

it's fun to make people laugh, i dun wanna lose my only ability..